February 2012
29 posts
Jeezus, this day. Mercury must be in Uranus. Or...
Just when you thought you could see to the bottom... →
Shitsucking cockbucket.
Regretsy Ass-Pillow Update... →
OMG, I cannot stop laughing, there’s a bunch of guys here from our Mexico City office and I think they think I’m drunk or crazy…
That Pajama-Wearing Sloth Has Killed My Blues...
…and I wish I could write a song about it.
DUDES! National Margarita Day! →
Make sure you do your part as a Patriotic American Who Likes Tequila.
Michelle Duggars Tells You How To Be a GREAT Wife... →
Re Elmo and the Beluga Whale...
Isn’t Elmo generally, well, naked? Why is he wearing swim trunks? So this furry red freak PUTS ON clothes to get wet, but hangs around furry-butt-naked the rest of the time? Can you say “Child Protective Services” ? I thought you could.
Things Go Better With Wine.
That Santorum Jacking-Off Gif Is About The Best...
Just sayin’.
It's so cold in here I have a pashmina wrapped...
I look like a rejected extra from “Potemkin”.
Typo In Proposition 8 Defines Marriage As Between... →
Well, this is gonna piss the zombies off.
I know I'm late to the Prop 8 party, but I had to...
Tumblr Redundancy Score: Infinity +1
Finally, California Pulls Its Head Out Of Its Ass,... →
Notes From My Workplace: Things You Shouldn't...
Hello all,
I’ve been meaning to send an email re this for some time, but frankly my interest in sending passive-aggressive notes about kitchen hygiene practices is actually pretty low. That being said, here we go: Please clean out any personal food items each Friday, specifically items in plastic ware, salads you bought but neglected to consume, etc. – if you have food items that are still...
Mittens Romney Not Concerned About "Very Poor"... →
The words “Let them eat cake may or may not have been uttered”…
January 2012
54 posts
When I see an article that says, “Healthy Treats For Your Super Bowl Party”, I know two things about that author: 1. They give away fruit on Halloween, and 2. They have also written an article called “Non-Alcoholic Drinks for Your New Year’s Party”.
>Finchy: Here's a Gross Medical Story For Your...
There was a story in the JAMA once about a guy who was using an industrial floor-mounted sander (like sandpaper on a conveyor belt) to masturbate. Yeah, I don’t know either. In any case, the torque from the thing practically ripped his nuts off. His solution: Staple ‘em back on. With an industrial stapler. He didn’t go to the hospital until about two days after the accident,...
There’s a port/on a western bay/and it serves/a hundred ships a day/lonely sailors/pass the time away/and talk about their homes…
I Love You Hoors
I’m a little tanked, but I’m pretty sure, for once, I’ll feel the same in the AM. You bishes amaze-balls me. Special shout-out to rosa-sparks and desertmar. You gurls know who you are.
Newt Says He Will Be Prez of Space...
“Extra” Farmers Will Man Space Stations”
“Mirrors on the Moon Will Light Benighted Crime Neighborhoods”.
Holy crap.
This Just In: Jan Brewer Is Still A Fucking Cunt.
Racist Goatblower. ”I Felt Threatened”. Yeah, cause those brothers always want to cut the white wimmen. Stupid fucking bitch.
And don’t even fucking TRY to call me out on anti-wimmen language or what have you. She is a STUPID FUCKING CUNT. Come at me bros and hos. I WILL DESTROY YOU! DESTROY.
The headline "Newt Vows Moon Colony" is rife with...
The Wailing Bean Sidhe: It's Gewgaws & Gimcracks... →
wailingbeansidhe:
You know what that means. Someone is going home with a shiny gewgaw, and this time it’s a Fancy One.
Triple-strand necklace with blue sapphires on 14k goldfill chain. This one. A $96 value, yours for FREE. YOU SAVE $96!
My Very Clumsy Rules:
To be eligible, like and/or reblog each of…
OMG U GUISE SO PRETTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MY President Makes Me PROUD to be an American.
Oh, this day is going bad faster than potato salad...